As a child I drove my parents and teachers bat shit crazy, and “fiercely independent” was a phrase I heard often (“pain in the ass” was also pretty common).

A lot of people have asked me, “Sam, why are you so __________,” rotating between stubborn, persistent, non-traditional, annoying…you get the idea. I used to respond with whatever smart ass remark came to mind, but I’ve actually given this question a ton of thought over the years. I think I finally have an answer:

Free Choice Programming

For a very, VERY long time I believed fiercely in the principle that we all possess free will, and that we’re free to make our own choices.

I have since changed by mind. Continue reading…

If you’re dead set on the path of escaping from your cage, then this is an absolutely critical lesson:

Stop Making Excuses

Stop. Right now. Make a commitment to yourself, to your future, and to any hope you have of ever being free to stop making excuses for your mistakes, shortcomings, or anything else that occurs in your life. Continue reading…

Everyone feels fear, though not everyone is willing to admit it. Some people feel the effects of fear more intensely than others, while others seem to feel no fear at all. Fear sucks, and we have the Amygdala and the Hypothalamus to thank for it.

Perhaps you’ve heard of the fight-or-flight response? Well, there is also a lesser-known third response that occurs in the face of fear: Cower.

Some people fight, and some people flee…but many people just shut down. They become, quite literally, paralyzed by fear. I believe that every single one of us, at one point in time or another, has cowered in fear. Continue reading…

It’s human nature to point the finger at someone else, to shield ourselves from fault and guilt. When we fail at something, or when something happens that we don’t like or don’t understand, we have a tendency to look outward for something or someone to blame.

“You take your life in your own hands, and what happens? A terrible thing: no one to blame.” – Erica Jong

We don’t like being wrong, feeling guilty, or facing things we can’t control or explain, so we do our damnedest to pass the buck and/or assign blame wherever possible.

But (and this is a BIG but) by assigning blame to someone else, we are essentially giving up our free choice. Saying “It’s so-and-so’s fault, not mine,” or anything to that effect might as well be translated as “I am but a sheep who follows the flock, and I therefore pass my free will off to someone else.” Continue reading…